Invasion of the Body Snatchers

I did a bad, bad thing today. I had to run to Target at lunch to pick up a birthday present for my dad, plus cards, gift bags, etc. But of course I got sucked in to the clothing department...oh Target, how you distract me from my actual purpose in your store! I decided to see if they had any cute bathing suit tops that I could pair with a bottom I already have. And then I saw a one piece that I decided to try on.

Okay, wow...obviously I forgot that you either have to buy the bathing suit at the store so you can try it on in the privacy of your own home, OR you can go into the changing room, under horrid lighting, and risk it. I risked it. And it was not a pretty sight.

Long gone are the days when I would head to the mall with my friends to find the perfect swim suit, walking out (willingly) to model whatever bikini I found and moaning and complaining about how imperfect my twenty year old body was.

Cue Cher: "If I could turn back time..."

Fast forward seven summers later...my oh my how things have changed. I went from having the metabolism of said twenty year old to gaining five pounds every time I looked at a carb. I went from my mom wondering if I had an eating disorder because I was too thin to people not recognizing me because I was too big (that's kind of an exaggeration, but you know). I went from never exercising and eating McDonalds several times a week to three times a week torture at Crossfit, eating Paleo-riffic, and just saying no to all white foods and sugar in my Starbucks.

Unfortunately, I can't blame my troubles away on a pregnancy because, duh, I don't have kids. I have to blame them on ME. Me being irresponsible with my health and me not noticing the signs until it was too late and then wondering when the body snatchers came and replaced my svelte figure with what it is now.

I will never look the same as I did when I was twenty years old. I have stretch marks. My body composition is different. I will eventually have a baby which will throw everything out of whack - again. But this twenty-seven year old body can do things its never done before. It can dead lift 220 pounds. It can hang onto a plank position (even if it's ugly) to complete an exercise. It's on its way to being able to do a pull up.

So body snatchers? Thanks. You may think you have ruined me, but just wait. I'll be back better, faster, and stronger than before. Holla.

Injuries.

I am not known for my gracefulness. Or my coordination. Or my ability to walk in high heels without stumbling (just a side note on that: I used to be VERY good at walking in high heels...when I wore them often. Now that ballet flats are back in vogue, I am content to be comfortable. Or wear my Rainbows.). I'm not quite sure how I made cheerleader in 7th & 8th grades...perhaps the judges felt sorry for me? I'm still somewhat suspicious that my mom paid them off believing that some paid off judges would be cheaper than the therapy she would have to send me to if I didn't make the squad.

I am the girl that knocks her head getting into a car, has random bruises that looks like I live with an abusive husband, twists her ankle walking down the stairs, and, as of last night, somehow bruises the knuckle of her thumb while doing 30 snatches. Don't worry, I finished the exercise despite the fact that I was pretty sure my thumb contained a cracked bone. Because I'm committed.

When Chad questioned how I injured myself, I had three words for him: "I don't know." Because I really DON'T HAVE A CLUE. I remember feeling my thumb hit the weight and thinking, oh wow, that hurt. But I don't remember how it happened or why my thumb was outside the region of where it was supposed to be to complete a snatch. Truly this injury defies logic. Almost as much as me being in my 8th week of Crossfit.

And also, can I please just mention that thumbs are very underrated until you have kind of lost the use of one? So here's to you, thumbs. Hopefully my lefty thumb will get better and my righty thumb will stay well and good. Because if not, I'm up a creek.

A Day In the "Olden Days"

Yesterday was positively blissful for me. Chad was working on finishing up some projects for his summer classes and I had the day to myself...the WHOLE. FREAKING. DAY. The house was relatively clean and the temperature outside was too dang hot to do anything outdoorsy (plus we spent all day Saturday at my MIL's pool), so on the way back from getting a coffee, I decided to spend the day on the couch, watching a movie - and not just any old movie...the sequel to Anne of Green Gables. All 4 hours of it. And the sequel to THAT, which is really not as good, but I feel like I'm not a "kindred spirit" unless I say that I like the movie that is supposedly the "continuation" of Anne's story, but really feels like Anne, Diana, and Gilbert are just trying to revitalize their careers and wind up looking super old in the process. Megan Follows (Anne for all you non-fans) also seems to have some sort of acne going on...maybe she is working on being the next Pro-Active spokeswoman? I digress.

Anne of Green Gables & Anne of Avonlea were the cornerstones of my childhood. For whatever reason, my mema, having a sixth sense of what her only granddaughter would love, purchased them sometime in the late '80's and I literally watched them to death, over and over, until I had the lines memorized and had developed a serious crush on Gilbert Blythe. I also wanted to dye my hair red and change the spelling of my middle name from A-n-n to A-n-n-e. My mom said no.

I related so much to Anne. Like her, I was too smart alecky and had a quick temper. I also tended to be somewhat clumsy, a little too quick to act, and was a romantic to the core, even at such a young age. I, too, wanted to be a writer so much I couldn't stand it. Needless to say, Anne's story became my own...I would watch certain scenes and then go outside and pick blackberries, wishing I lived on Prince Edward Island and had my own Gilbert.

Watching her story now, I realize that my take on the whole Anne saga has changed a little...maybe because I understand that what was a story about a little orphan girl is really the saga of a young woman bucking traditions to make her own way, touching lives and finding herself in the process.

I still repeated movie lines, much to Chad's amusement. Thankfully, he puts up with my romantic notions and the fact that I love made for TV dramas from 80's. Bless his heart. Even though he would never admit it, I think he secretly likes the Anne movies.

I guess I found my Gilbert after all.

Don't Let The Overhead Squats Get You Down

Last night was my worst night at Crossfit. It was hot. It was humid. I was in a seriously bad mood. It's been quite a week for the Butler's. We have run into some financial issues, Chad is overloaded with school stuff, and my company has won a contract that could potentially ruin my vacation plans for the summer. Needless to say, there have been some tears shed this week!

So last night, we get to Crossfit early. And I see running going on. I hate running. And did I mention that you could literally drown in the heat and humidity? I tried to push it out of my mind and focus on good things...not that there seemed to be many good things, but I was trying. I decided that I wanted to try and do a pull up with the bands, something that has been one of my goals since I started Crossfit. When we do pull ups now, I have to do it with rings - leaning all the way back and pulling myself up. I feel like the special ed Crossfitter doing that. I want to do what everyone else is doing. So Chad sets up the bands and I put my foot in and try to kip myself up to the bar and yeah...wasn't happening. I tried again and it didn't happen again. Disappointment.

So we start warming up, a group warm up which involved using the bands to do an overhead squat...it was weird, but if my trainer says it's helpful, I go with it. Note to self: do not let bands go because they will hit you, make loud noises and welps, and pretty much embarrass you to death. It happened, yes. Awesome.

On to the workout...did I mention that overhead squats are hard? Because they are. I loaded up my bar with two tens and was ready to go. I squatted and promptly fell over. Took the tens off and used the bar...fell again. Nice. Did I mention that I was a special ed Crossfitter?

End of the story...I didn't finish the work out. I stopped at 3 rounds. And then I cried all the way home because I didn't finish. It was failure in it's purest form - all because I was in a negative frame of mind and was mad because I wasn't able to do everything EXACTLY like everyone else. Instead of doing what I could do, I gave up and exchanged that fantastic feeling finishing gives you for tears on the way home.

My husband said (as we were pulled over on an on-ramp because I was freaking him out by crying), "You should be proud of what you CAN do. There's no way you would've been able to do what you did today when we first started. It takes patience." My oh my...patience. The Bible talks about it. Guns 'N Roses sang about it. And I so don't have it.

Celebrations

This past weekend, I traveled with my best friend, Chelle, to Columbia to celebrate a mutual friend's engagement. Despite the god awful heat that Cola is known for (I refer to it as the "arm pit of the South") and the fact that we were in Gamecock territory, we had a wonderful time. There is nothing sweeter than watching a friend in love and happy. The party was beautiful, on a rooftop bar overlooking the stadium and thankfully I was saved by heat stroke by large amounts of Pinot. Just call me Ramona Singer (if you don't watch "Real Housewives" you aren't going to get that joke).

Kel & Amanda

(the end of the night...that should explain my weird bang issues)

I love that summer is a time for celebrations...birthdays, holidays weddings/engagements/showers/babies. Summer is a time to put on your best sundress and flip flops and dance to beach music until dawn.

If you can stand the heat. And if you have Pinot.

Make It Through Hump Day...

Today has been one of those REALLY slow days that just drag on by. I can see the sun shining outside and while my body is in front of of a computer screen being productive, my heart is outside by a pretty swimming pool, getting some sun and finishing up The Passage (a really good book, by the way - out of the realm of what I normally read, but I would recommend it). It is on days like this that I wish my career included a summer vacation! There is just nothing worse than watching the summer roll by while you're indoors. Summer was made for being outside!!!

I know that in a few hours, I will be saying the opposite...that summer is made for A/C. Chad and I Crossfit tonight and, because we basically work out in a glorified shed that most definitely does not have air condtioning, we will sweating to death at our 7 pm class.

Yes, we are still Crossfitting. I am so proud to be able to say that! It has become a semi-addiction for us both...and while I am still in the same size, I am noticing some subtle changes to my body. My arms and legs are becoming more toned, which is GREAT. Yes, I want to be slim again, but it took longer than 6 weeks to gain all this weight (it sure didn't feel like it, but it did), and it will take longer than 6 weeks to get it off. But it will happen.

Chad is already getting his muscle back...it's amazing. The whole "muscle memory" thing is so true. We have also been eating Paleo (or sticking to it as close as we can) and trying our best not to cheat. We still have our moments though - I have lattes (fat/sugar free) and the occasional piece of chocolate. I also had a small affair with a piece of sourdough bread from Atlanta Bread Co. But the daily gorging of carbs? It doesn't happen anymore. No more cereal, no more bread with dinner, no more spaghetti noodles, no more starchy beans and corn. Instead, we have our veggies and lean protein, eat salads and fruit, and of course many, many egg whites. We both went a little nuts over my ice cream birthday cake from Bruster's over the weekend, but good grief,  you have to LIVE!

Here's hoping your hump day flies by quickly!

And Now I Am 27

I turned another year older on my trip to Texas last week, June 9 to be exact. I am now 27 years of age...still in twenties, but cutting it close, my friends. Turning 27 hasn't been a traumatic experience; on the contrary, it's been pretty freakin' fun! My darling Chad met me at the airport on my birthday night (actually, it was the wee hours of the morning on June 10th, but no need to get technical), brought me home to a fantastic b-day present (Switchflops, I am so in love), sweet card, and CHEESECAKE! He helped me blow out the candles on another year, something he has been doing for a while now.

We had a fun cook out this past Saturday night, too, with our family and friends. It was a lovely way to start a new birthday year. People came and brought presents, cards, and well wishes...which is what I love the most (the well wishes). I am very blessed, indeed, to have people in my life who care whether or not I have a good birthday. Many people don't have that luxury. So thank you, family and friends!

So what has happened over the past year for Chad and I? Let's recap:

We welcomed our first nephew into the world, we redecorated our house, celebrated holidays, went to the beach and lake, went on the Polar Express for Christmas, Chad started at USC Upstate (which meant the end is near for his Bachelor's), we started Crossfit, and we celebrated our first wedding anniversary. 26 was quite an eventful year!

I am very much looking forward to seeing what happens at age 27!

Up In The Air

So here I am, at the airport terminal, waiting for my flight to board. I hate flying. I hate everything about. But I am waiting to walk step by step to board the plane. Here you go, Mr. Pilot and crew...here is control over my destiny, my destination, my freakin' LIFE. I know I don't know you, but supposedly you're alcohol/drug free, up to safety standards, and know what that little button on the left does. Hopefully you can land this bird, no prob. But just a little reminder from little 'ole me: I have a family here. I have two dogs. I have a husband who I hugged so tight this morning I may have dislocated a rib. So if you could PLEASE just return me to where I started, I would be most grateful.

Yes, y'all, my fear is really that bad. I'm okay now: I have some magic pills that make the anxiety disappate. I've been on airplanes since I was five years old. I have flown to Hawaii and back (not a short trip for those who are geographically challenged). Why, in the past few years, has flying become such a personal fear for me? I mean, I literally spent my WEDDING NIGHT laying in bed eating mac 'n cheese from the reception with no thought of consummating my marriage because my new husband and I were flying to Mexico the next day. The thought of boarding the plane had me convinced it would be my last night on earth and I needed to compensate with cheese, dang it! I'm surprised I didn't board that plane to Mexico by myself!

So I am back in this circle of fear. Scared, but also looking at myself and going, you wuss. You can dead lift 220 lbs, almost do a for real push up, and can eat spaghetti squash like a fiend. You're scared of transportation that is safer than riding in a car and train? Get over it.

And maybe I will when I'm safely on the ground again.

Sunday Night Drive

It was a beautiful night last night...and I was able to capture the mountains on our way to the farm...I just thought it was such a beautiful sight that I made Chad turn around so I could get a picture of it. Not a very good one, but hey, I was in a truck going down the road!

The farm has a very long driveway and I was being all sentimental to Chad, talking about how the "mist was rising off the grass" and how mysterious and beautiful it all looked. He said, "Um...I think that's just steam." It had just rained. So much for poetic words.

Paleo Meatloaf...Results

First off, I need to preface this by saying that I've never been a huge fan of meatloaf. It wasn't a dinnertime staple at our house and the only meatloaf I've ever really liked was my step-mother's and I've only had it maybe twice.

So here goes:

Paleo Meatloaf recipe from Everyday Paleo:

1 diced red onion
2 lbs grass fed ground beef (we used regular ground beef 93/7 ratio)
1 cup almond meal
2 eggs
1 can tomato paste (sugar free/organic)
1 tbsp crushed garlic
1/2 tbsp sea salt
2 tbsp dried basil
1 tsp marjoram
cracked black pepper to taste (we used regular ground pepper)

Mix all ingredients by hand in a large mixing bowl. Place meat mixture into a large glass baking pan and form into a loaf. Bake at 350 degress for 1 hour or until meat is no longer pink in the middle.


Paleo Ketchup from our Crossfit nutritional website, Feed the Beast:

1 small can of plain, sugar free tomato sauce
1 small can tomato paste
2 tsp vinegar (we used apple cider vinegar)
3/4 tsp garlic powder
pinch of ground cloves
1/4 tsp allspice

Combine all ingredients in a small sauce pan and simmer for 10-15 minutes. Let cool and transfer to container and then into fridge.


Chad and I did not put the ketchup directly on the meatloaf, but rather used it as a dipping sauce after the meatloaf was cooked.

The result? It wasn't half bad. The almond flour (yeah, I had never heard of it either) provided a new texture/taste - kind of nutty - but the loaf itself held together just like normal meatloaf and had the same consistency. I think that we may use a little less than a whole cup of almond flour next time - it was a bit on the dry side...which is where Paleo ketchup came in! NO it's not Heinz. Let me just put that out there. Regular ketchup is full of sugar, high fructose corn syrup, etc...mainly precious, lovely things that we can't eat on our Paleo diet. But Paleo ketchup is okay...I may use a tiny bit less vinegar next time, or research a lighter, sweeter vinegar - apple cider vinegar has a bite to it. (PS, I tried drinking the stuff mixed with water a while back because I heard that it would aid in weightloss - oh my dear Lord, don't do it!). We didn't add vegetables with the meal - I was going to do asparagus, but we just didn't - but the meatloaf filled us up...I only had one medium slice and I was done.

Chad also fixed a great, simple dessert - mashed bananas mixed with vanilla extract, frozen. It was GREAT! He's such a trooper...I know deep down he wants a bacon cheeseburger and half and half from Pete's.

Tonight's menu:
Steak stirfry...should be pretty simple, but we'll see...

Oh, Paleo!

When we started Crossfit almost 4 weeks ago (yup, I said FOUR), we knew that in addition to working our butts off, we were going to seriously have to change our eating patterns. Both Chad and I hate to make decisions, are pretty much lazy when it comes to food, and are HUGE fans of starches dipped in hot oil - or french fries to the layman. Actually, we're fans of starches in any shape or form - bread, cereal, oatmeal...if it's a processed grain or has copious amounts of sugar, consider us ready to eat!

Our instructor told us that the Crossfit stance on nutrition was the Zone diet, made famous by Jen Aniston and her incredibly buff arms. The Zone diet is semi-complex, based on portion size, and pretty much irritating until you get it down pat. The instructor also told us about a group challenge that was underway - the Paleo challenge. Meaning Paleolithic. Or the "caveman diet." After Chad and I laughed about it, we both started doing a little research on it and even bought a book about it. And to tell you the truth, it's pretty interesting.

Unlike the Zone, where portions are key, the Paleo diet is all about the quality of the foods you eat - namely no grains, no sugars, etc. It's all based on what Paleolithic man ate - namely lean meats, fish, wild game, eggs, fruits, and vegetables. Which is great because both Chad and I are avid carnivores and both love fruits and vegetables.

Last week, we ate Paleo Monday thru Friday. I did drink lattes everyday (non-fat milk, no sugar syrup) which is a no-no, but for goodness sakes, what's a Starbucks fiend to do??? Memorial Day weekend, we cheated. Badly. Both of us.

And I paid for it yesterday during my workout - and I'm sure Chad will when he has his WOD today.

BUT we are back on Paleo. Last night we had spaghetti Paleo style - the noodles being from a spaghetti squash heated in the microwave and the sauce being made with lean ground beef, drained, fresh bell pepper & onion, and organic sauce with ZERO sugar. It's delicious, even though both Chad and I miss "real" spaghetti noodles.

Tonight is Paleo meatloaf. I don't want to put the recipe on here, in case it's horrible, but it does use some new ingredients that I've never tried before - namely almond flour, which is almonds chopped into powder form instead of using white or wheat flour. We'll be having meatloaf with asparagus sauteed in EVOO.

Stay tuned.

Memorial Day

I am not an outdoorsy/able to "rought it" kind of girl, much to my husband's dismay. He likes to camp, I like to go to spas for hours being pampered. He is happy sleeping on a rock, I will not lay upon anything less than 400 TC sheets. He can go days without bathing, I need my special shampoo, special soap, special conditioner, special face wash...

You get the picture.

Which is why this weekend was the best of both worlds and in my opinion, I roughed it. We headed down to my dad's family's lake house this weekend for a nice 3 day adventure with my dad, step-mom, and 4 year old sister. And their new puppy who is gigantic, Tucker. And our two dogs, one of which is semi-gigantic himself.

It was our first weekend of the summer back in the house, so there was the usual stuff to deal with...getting the boats in the water, cleaning up squirrel mess (yuck), watching for scary insects that may have moved in over the winter. To be honest, the first weekend back is a little stressful because of all those things, plus three dogs and a 4 year old running around.

After our first night, when all of us were kept up by the unrelenting heat of a house coming out of hibernation, we finally figured out that there was something wrong with the AC. And by something wrong, I mean, it wasn't working. AT ALL. And it was very, very hot. And humid. And did I mention hot? Instead of packing it up and heading back to spend Memorial Day weekend in the coolness of our hacienda, we toughed it out. Thankfully the weather cooperated somewhat on our mission to cool down the house by monsooning 90% of the weekend. Not weather conducive to all day fun on the lake, but hey, we were able to stop sweating so profusely while we hung out inside.

And that is how I roughed it on Memorial Day weekend. Not exactly sleeping on a rock, but for me, it was close enough. SC summer with no heat? That is beyond roughing it!